Damned Nose Hairs
Oct 01
I have quirks. It’s part of who I am; part of my make-up if you will. I chew my tongue (don’t ask) and I always have, and as hard as I try I simply cannot make myself stop. I do it without realizing it and then someone has to tell me to stop and then I get mad at being called out when I should have realized myself. I also twiddle my thumbs, left/right/left – I just got called out right now for chewing – RIGHT NOW – /right/left/right. It’s very hard to stop twiddling because if I do something on the right I have to do it on the left and it never ends.
For the past few weeks I’ve had a new struggle; I feel like I have a hair stuck to the tip of my nose. When it first started, I just kept scratching my nose and trying to find the hair. Eventually I searched in the mirror, but I never saw anything. The hair remained, taunting me, tickling me, reminding me more and more that I am not normal; I’m quirky.
Eventually I let Hot Joe in on my predicament in the hopes that he would miraculously discover the random hair torturing me. Alas, he found none and walked quietly out of the room and up the stairs, leaving me to twiddle, chew and scratch alone.
A few minutes later I heard him as he rounded the corner upstairs.
“I have the same problem, babe. I have a hair that I can’t find too. Can you maybe find it for me?”
My question (and I’m not sure I want an answer): Where did hairless Joe get the hair for this joke?
He checked the tub, where most of my hair ends up, to no avail. He then checked the bathroom floor. Nice try – I wipe that up as often as possible. There was a pile from my shower sitting in the trash. At least it was freshly washed!!!! And you think he’s hairless NOW…
All I can do is shake my head. I already gagged a little at Syl’s question.
She likes the details. We’re close. We overshare.
We all just love Hot Joe!
Did he study under the Dalia Lama or something because his sense of humor is monk-ish. Or Yiddish. My husband would’ve told me to just shave.
No, he’s just freakishly Yiddishy-Monkish. Plus Italian, Irish and ex-military. That has to count for something.